Self-help for judges

Ladies & gentlemen, pardon the intrusion.
I’m not here to find anyone guilty.
I don’t take bribes.
I don’t look at porn on my court computer.
I don’t punch out defense lawyers no matter how obnoxious.
I’m just asking you today to find it in your hearts to give me a raise.
A penny, a nickel, ten thou retroactive, anything you can spare.
God bless you, ladies & gentlemen,
and remember – this could be you someday.

About Appellate Squawk

A satirical blog for criminal defense lawyers and their friends who won't give up without a squawk.
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