The NYPD Patrol Guide to the Constitution

Cop.constitutional help

Recently Judge Android and a trio of First Department Judgettes declared that it was A-OK for the cops to Taser a man who was violently objecting to their “trying to help him” after his girlfriend told them he’d had a seizure, by handcuffing him behind his back, hog-tying him to a stretcher, and carting him out of his apartment to the hospital.  Obviously an “emotionally disturbed” nutcase who thought his health was his own business.  Pacheco v. City of NY and P.O. Lopez.  

According to the First Department, Tasering people who are so emotionally disturbed as to resist medical treatment alla polizia is a constitutionally reasonable use of force. Why? Because the NYPD Patrol Guide says so.

Courts all over the country are smiting their collective foreheads. Why didn’t we think of that? Instead of all those time-wasting suppression hearings and civil rights trials, just ask the police what conduct is constitutionally acceptable.  After all, if correcting judicial errors is entirely up to the judiciary, why shouldn’t the same apply to the cops?

Thanks and a tip o’ the hat to civil rights blogger-squawker Andrew Stoll, Esq.

About Appellate Squawk

A satirical blog for criminal defense lawyers and their friends who won't give up without a squawk.
This entry was posted in Civil Liberties, Law & Parody and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The NYPD Patrol Guide to the Constitution

  1. A part of me is thankful we still believe police exist to help us. I wish reality weren’t so different from our ideal.


  2. PK in the PNW says:

    Arizona update! Been run off the road by an unlicensed crazy driver? Scared out of your wits from the potential mash up? Not to worry! Arizona’s finest will appear and let you know that it’s for the benefit of all that YOU are the one carted off to jail! Why? ‘Because you were upset, ma’am.’ 10 hours later, ‘released’, walking around in the dark trying to figure out where I am (cuz my tags are Washington State, and gee, guess that’s where I actually live fear crissakes) in this nut case state, and then, five months later, receiving a bill in the mail (past due, natch, cuz they had no idea a Washington tagged car wasn’t an Arizona vehicle) for fees due for this experience in excess of $1,500. Fees? For what? For the 10 minute ride from from site of near miss accident to site of police station. Literally.
    Seriously, if their transport fees are so high, why not go total free market with the yellow cab service for $6.50
    Signed, -furious in WA State


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