How to keep your employees safe and happy: give them guns for Christmas

A Wisconsin glassware company has discovered the perfect Christmas gift for its employees: a gift certificate for a gun.

“For us, now, we have an entire armed staff,” co-owner Ben Wolfgram told the Appleton Post-Crescent. “I think that’s pretty good.”

The company’s name is BenShot and this is the kind of glassware they sell:

   

“We are a small, close-knit team at BenShot,” said Wolfgram. “I want to make sure all of employees are safe and happy – a handgun was the perfect gift.”

It turned out that some employees “already had enough handguns.” They were allowed to use their gift cards for rifles instead.

Gee, we wish our boss would do that. An entire armed staff might solve a lot of problems.

You say your BenShot glass leaks?

About Appellate Squawk

A satirical blog for criminal defense lawyers and their friends who won't give up without a squawk.
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3 Responses to How to keep your employees safe and happy: give them guns for Christmas

  1. Alex Bunin says:

    In Texas, a firearm is considered much too personal a gift to come from some office secret Santa. Only a loved one knows your caliber.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Mad Jack says:

    I wish I worked for that company.

    I have no problem with my coworkers being armed and dangerous. Clearly the police share the same view as I, but maybe you think the police are inherently better than the great unwashed. Which is me and people like me.

    Having all your employees armed has one distinct advantage – it’s certain that no one will attack the workforce as part of a mass shooting. Murderers and terrorists avoid hard targets.

    Like

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