Category Archives: Criminal Defense Appeals

Chief to judges: dissent at your own risk.

Does your boss stifle dissent? You’re not alone! The fearless Judge Saxe, retired from the First Department, reveals that Chief Judge Flowerpot refuses to let judges stay past retirement age if they’ve written too many unsuccessful dissents. Used to be that … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Judges, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | 2 Comments

Ineffective Assistance of Counsel, Aussie Style

One of our worst moments as an appellate squawk was sitting in an Alabama courtroom watching a lawyer hand over his former client’s entire file to the prosecutor.  The idea being that if a defendant argues on appeal that his … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Criminal law | Tagged | 1 Comment

New labels for old

We’ve just received a directive to reform our vocabulary in compliance with The Criminal Justice Reform Phrase Guide authored by The Opportunity Agenda, a progressive propaganda outfit describing itself as a “social justice communication lab” that “shapes compelling messages and narratives” to … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Law & Parody | Tagged | 3 Comments

Albany prosecutor fired for secretly writing defense briefs

Defense lawyer Cheryl Coleman thought it was a brilliant idea to hire her local Assistant District Attorney – the aptly named Steve Sharp – to write her criminal appeals on the QT.  For years, Sharp and Coleman regularly appeared against … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged , , | 18 Comments

How to get judges to read your brief

Judge Saxe is at it again, handing out more smug advice about appellate briefwriting.  “The reply brief is an important document,” he intones.  It’s “the last word” that the judges will read. It should consist of “short, declarative, punchy sentences.” Based on “abundant … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Judges, Law & Parody, Satire and parody | Tagged , | 9 Comments

Quality clobbering at Rikers

New York City’s jail guards are highly offended at a poster displayed on the jailhouse walls exhorting them to “KEEP CALM AND REMEMBER EGOS AND UOF [Use Of Force] DON’T MIX.” The sign went up in response to the federal monitor’s recent … Continue reading

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“What cross-race charge? What are you talking about?”

“All the identifying witnesses were speaking from casual observation of men they had never seen before, men of foreign race, under circumstances of unusual confusion.” Felix Frankfurter, The Case of Sacco and Vanzetti (1923). We recently watched an oral argument … Continue reading

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