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Judge Wool says
“Truth comes knocking at the door and everybody jumps out the window.” — Bill Cosby
- People’s briefs and other horror fiction
- “My pronouns are sheehurr… so yours would be?”
- May it really, really displease the court
- Defending the Second Amendment
- May It Displease the Court
- Covid in the Courtrooms: an Unnecessary Risk
- Judge Jack Weinstein 1921-2021
- In-Person Oral Argument Should Go the Way of the Dodo
- Convicting Bill Cosby: “An Unconstitutional Coercive Bait-and-Switch”
- Judge Conviser rips into SORA
- Adios, 2020!
- THE BEST OF APPELLATE SQUAWK 2010-2020
- Call a rose by any other name and it’ll see you in court
- Try the new high-tech system for alienating your clients
- Outdoor Public Defending
- Why do cops lie? Because judges believe them.
- Courts to replace juries with potted plants
- Do Statues Matter?
- Sexual thoughts and the First Amendment
- COVID-19 masks for judges
- Judges in trouble
- Hell hath no fury like a client scorned
- “Don’t you dare invite me to your stupid Zoom party!”
- Janitors, Catholic schoolteachers and the Hosanna exception
- Supreme Court hears robocall case, flushes toilet
- “Planet of the Humans”
- The virus, like the rain, falleth on the just and the unjust
- The NYC arraignment scandal: part 2
- NYC courtrooms: the arraignment scandal
- Squawk under house arrest
- Must be true, says so right here in the Probation Report
- Discovery reform in Brooklyn: fuggetabout WitCom
- Happy Lunar New Year 2020: Year of the Rat
- The Sex Offender Bus
- Head for the hills, discovery reform arrives with the New Year!
- Annals of Social Injustice: Affluent People Drinking Rosé in Central Park
- Is it silly to demand transparency from appellate courts?
- “Your question has nothing to do with this case, Judge.”
- Not your law office? Click here.
- Let’s keep dogs off the witness stand.
- Forget speed dating, try jury duty!
- The Busywork Conspiracy
- Life in non-punitive therapeutic civil commitment is not what you think
- Buster the civil commitment dog
- Is it a crime to sleep it off in your car?
- What really happens in court: the unvarnished truth
- Putting the brakes on “victims’ rights”
- Maestro James Levine (somewhat) rehabilitated
- The Compulsory Program Mystique
- Fox snarls at pursuing hounds, is shot for bullying behavior
- Follow Appellate Squawk on WordPress.com
Category Archives: Criminal law
Now in the 5th month of the COVID-19 shelter-in-place era, our Guv (“I live alone with a dog and we’re getting pretty sick of each other”) has just reinstated the ban on indoor public dining. Meanwhile the courts, which have … Continue reading
It was a great party, but when you get into your car, you realize you drank more than you thought. No worries. You switch on the heat or the AC, crank up your favorite radio station, close your eyes and … Continue reading
“The Young Savages,” a 1961 movie about teenage gangs (Italo-Americans vs. Puerto Ricans), filmed on the streets of pre-gentrified New York, opens with three Italo teens killing a Puerto Rican youth who’s not only unarmed but blind. “New York is … Continue reading
A few years ago we briefed an appeal from probably the worst trial since Sacco and Vanzetti. When Judge “This-is-MY-courtroom” Napaloni wasn’t screaming at the defendant and his lawyer, he was encouraging the prosecutor to put in outrageously prejudicial-not-remotely-probative evidence. … Continue reading
Have you ever had the Clerk of the Court reject a brief that you’ve labored over for months just because you signed in black ink instead of blue? Refuse to accept your brilliantly insightful case-of-first-impression masterpiece because you wrote “Printing … Continue reading
Every now and then, a judge will declare that a trial is “a search for the truth,” or, in one drunk driving case, a sober search for the truth. The judge continued, “In the search for truth, no man has yet … Continue reading
One of our worst moments as an appellate squawk was sitting in an Alabama courtroom watching a lawyer hand over his former client’s entire file to the prosecutor. The idea being that if a defendant argues on appeal that his … Continue reading
The videotapes show that “the questioning [of the Central Park Five] was respectful, dignified, carried out according to the letter of the law and with sensitivity to the young age of the men. . . . If you spot the first sign of … Continue reading
“The Government got up and said. . . we want other people to see his sentence and to think twice about committing a crime. And I remember Judge Glasser looked at the assistant and said, what you’re suggesting is that … Continue reading
Back in the days of the Roman Empire, the mad Emperor Caligula had the penal code placed at the top of a tall column in the Forum. Judges soon got tired of shinnying up and down whenever they had to … Continue reading
A Bronx judge, fed up with the prosecution’s shilly-shallying while the accused waited in jail for three years, threatened to conduct the trial sans attorneys, according to In Justice Today. Not since Columbus and the egg has there been such a brilliantly obvious solution … Continue reading
“The fact that defendant may have been the only person in the photographic lineup wearing white sneakers does not render the lineup unduly prejudicial – even though the victims’ description of the perpetrator included white sneakers – as the clothing … Continue reading
The Louisiana Supreme Court recently decided that a suspect in custody had failed to unequivocally invoke his right to counsel, based on his statement transcribed as, “If y’all think I did it, I know that I didn’t do it so … Continue reading
Here we see NYPD Police Officer James Frascatore using the “straight arm bar takedown” on Mr. James Blake whom he mistook for a suspect in a credit card scam. Not only did he have the wrong man, Mr. Blake was … Continue reading
Recently received from our employer (we’re not making this up): “[Public Defender] urges and expects employees to report harassing and discriminatory behavior of third parties, including clients. . . . Rest assured that the response of [Public Defender] to clients who engage in … Continue reading
Prosecutors see nothing wrong with summing up with Powerpoint like this: Well, two can play this game. Here are some handy graphics for defense summations:
Since prosecutors’ summations are basically commercials to sell the jury on a guilty verdict, it was only a matter of time before they started using advertising graphics. In People v. Santiago (2014), New York’s top court saw nothing wrong with the People’s … Continue reading
We recently briefed a case where the judge came back from lunch and announced, “The Court has arrived at a verdict. The verdict is –,” until the parties frantically stopped her. The trial hadn’t finished yet! She apologized and sat … Continue reading
The U.S. Department of Justice has issued new recommendations for photo arrays – when cops show a witness the suspect’s photo along with photos of five other guys and ask which one is the perp. The DOJ thinks it would look … Continue reading
Scene: SORA hearing in front of Judge Dudgeon Bludgeon. ADA Tightskirt: Judge, Mr. Claus should be adjudicated a Level 3 maximum risk sex offender. He’s a recidivist sexually motivated burglar. Santa Claus: (appearing pro se) Nonsense! I’ve never had any trouble … Continue reading