Category Archives: First Amendment

Sexual thoughts and the First Amendment

Mr. Bacon, a guest of the government at Ray Brook Federal Correctional Institution, wrote to his sister about the guards, “There is only one Black Woman here. I believe she is an Indian. She is very beautiful and healthy. I … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Law & Parody, Prisoners' rights | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Life in non-punitive therapeutic civil commitment is not what you think

Jimmy Pesci, author and publisher of the outlawed blog Duck Soup and its successor FCCC Instigator, is one of 6,000 men in this country who, after completing their sentences, are being held indefinitely behind locked doors and razor-wire fences while the … Continue reading

Posted in Civil Liberties, First Amendment, Law & Parody, Prisoners' rights | Tagged | 1 Comment

Supreme Court to Patent Office: Don’t FUCT with the 1st Amendment

  Wanna look cool and edgy? Drive over to your local mall and buy a FUCT® t-shirt! Your friends hanging out at Shake Shack will take their noses out of their I-phones and exclaim, “Look at that viewpoint of non-compliance … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, satire, Supreme Court | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Is it legal to threaten to behead the Chief Clerk of the Court?

Have you ever had the Clerk of the Court reject a brief that you’ve labored over for months just because you signed in black ink instead of blue? Refuse to accept your brilliantly insightful case-of-first-impression masterpiece because you wrote “Printing … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal law, First Amendment, Law & Parody | 4 Comments

Masterpiece Cakeshop refuses birthday cake for Satan

I’m thinking a three-tiered white cake. Cheesecake frosting. And the topper should be a large figure of Satan, licking a 9” black Dildo. I would like the dildo to be an actual working model, that can be turned on before … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Satirical cartoons | Tagged | 2 Comments

The ACLU uncompromisingly defends free speech — unless it’s offensive.

Why is everybody so down on the poor old ACLU just because of an internal memo proclaiming its zealous defense of free speech unless it offends vulnerable and marginalized minorities?  Even the NY Post joined the affray, moaning, “ACLU Stops Caring About Free … Continue reading

Posted in Civil Liberties, First Amendment, Satire and parody | Tagged | 9 Comments

Cake, religion and Summa [obscenity deleted] Laude

We didn’t make this up: a proud mom ordered a cake to celebrate her son’s graduation “Summa Cum Laude.”  The bakery took it upon itself to eliminate the obscene word “cum,” and replace it with dashes, as shown above. Can’t … Continue reading

Posted in Civil Liberties, First Amendment | Tagged | 10 Comments

“The Constitution does not require Florida to join New York in la-la-land.”

Whenever a court invokes the old saw that constitutional rights can’t be stopped at the prison gate, it’s even money that the court is just about to do exactly that. The latest is the 11th Circuit’s upholding of the Florida … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Prisoners' rights, Satire and parody | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

The Case of Masterpiece Cakeshop

What’s an evangelical Christian baker to do when asked to design and decorate a custom cake for a gay wedding? If he complies, he violates his religious objections to same-sex marriage. If he refuses, he’s prosecuted for violating the public … Continue reading

Posted in Civil Liberties, First Amendment, Law | Tagged | 11 Comments

Is a license plate government speech?

What’s the difference, you may ask, between this bumper sticker, which is permitted: and this license plate, which is prohibited: except that one costs fifty cents and the other costs thousands of dollars? The difference is of overwhelming constitutional significance, … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Law, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged , , , , | 5 Comments

The 1st Amendment pinball machine

The First Amendment is simple: you can say anything you want unless the Government says you can’t. Confused by all that chin music about “viewpoint discrimination,” “limited public forum,” “time place and manner,” etc.?  Think of it as a pinball … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Humor, Law, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | 3 Comments

Ratting out the First Amendment

  The First Amendment is alive and well in New York, at least where inflated rats are concerned. “It is abundantly clear that Local 78 has a constitutional right to use an inflatable rat,” ruled a federal judge in a … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Humor, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Have you been “friended” by DA Vandal?

Last January the Manhattan DA’s Office indicted 106 people including 72 NYPD cops, 8 firefighters and 5 Corrections Officers for bilking Social Security out of $400 million in phony disability claims. The scheme was masterminded by a former senior Nassau County … Continue reading

Posted in Civil Liberties, Criminal Defense Appeals, Criminal law, First Amendment, Humor, Law & Parody | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

In Ceremonial Deism We Trust

The Second Circuit has just blown off the Rev. Michael Newdow, founder of the First Atheist Church of True Science (FACTS), who’s been arguing to federal courts across the country that putting “In God We Trust” on our moola violates the … Continue reading

Posted in First Amendment, Law & Parody | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment