Category Archives: Judges

When is a trial not a trial? When there’s no jury.

We recently briefed a case where the judge took the bench after the lunch break and announced, “The Court has arrived at a verdict.  The verdict is –,” until the parties frantically stopped her. The trial hadn’t finished yet!  She … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal law, Judges, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged | 2 Comments

How to describe judicial decisionmaking without being held in contempt

The biggest challenge of appellate writing is figuring out how to convey without actually saying so that the trial judge was an uninformed barnacle.  Especially when the standard of review is that the judge is always right.  The appellate squawker … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Humor, Judges, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged | 3 Comments

From the archives: Judge Rakoff on graffiti and Oedipus Rex

From “The Villager,” August 24, 2005 Chelsea graffiti party Federal Judge Jed S. Rakoff on Monday ordered the Bloomberg administration to reinstate a permit for a Wed. Aug. 24 Chelsea block party featuring the painting of graffiti on mock subway … Continue reading

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Buttering up the judge

We recently came across this drawing by our hero Honoré Daumier (1808-1879) (whose desperate advocate we’ve appropriated in our masthead) that says everything you need to know about preparing for oral argument:  “Ai-je besoin d’éloquence devant un juge si haut … Continue reading

Posted in Judges, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | 3 Comments

How to keep your brief under the word limit

Judges are always kvetching that appellate briefs are too long and BO-ring or, as Judge Saxe says, “turgid and prolix.”  The federal judish has decided to strike back by slashing word limits from 14,000 to 13,000. The decree sparked howls … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Judges, Law & Parody, Satirical cartoons | Tagged | 6 Comments

The NY Court of Appeals gets its comeuppance

When it comes to federal habeas petitions, never has so much been denied to so many by so few. To the prisoner, a habeas is the last bastion of hope. To the federal judish, it’s the occasion for assuring state … Continue reading

Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Criminal law, Judges, Law, Satirical cartoons | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

Justice Ginsburg speaks her mind. . . and is sorry.

Millions of Americans who were ready to vote for Trump abruptly changed their minds after Justice Ginsburg publicly stated that if he were president, “I can’t imagine what the country would be.”  “He says whatever comes into his head at … Continue reading

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