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I'm not a misanthrope. I just don't feel the same reverence for people they feel for themselves.
Today’s Quote
“Truth comes knocking at the door and everybody jumps out the window.” — Bill Cosby
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Recent Posts
- People’s briefs and other horror fiction
- “My pronouns are sheehurr… so yours would be?”
- May it really, really displease the court
- Defending the Second Amendment
- May It Displease the Court
- Covid in the Courtrooms: an Unnecessary Risk
- Judge Jack Weinstein 1921-2021
- In-Person Oral Argument Should Go the Way of the Dodo
- Convicting Bill Cosby: “An Unconstitutional Coercive Bait-and-Switch”
- Judge Conviser rips into SORA
- Adios, 2020!
- THE BEST OF APPELLATE SQUAWK 2010-2020
- Call a rose by any other name and it’ll see you in court
- Try the new high-tech system for alienating your clients
- Outdoor Public Defending
- Why do cops lie? Because judges believe them.
- Courts to replace juries with potted plants
- Do Statues Matter?
- Sexual thoughts and the First Amendment
- COVID-19 masks for judges
- Judges in trouble
- Hell hath no fury like a client scorned
- “Don’t you dare invite me to your stupid Zoom party!”
- Janitors, Catholic schoolteachers and the Hosanna exception
- Supreme Court hears robocall case, flushes toilet
- “Planet of the Humans”
- The virus, like the rain, falleth on the just and the unjust
- The NYC arraignment scandal: part 2
- NYC courtrooms: the arraignment scandal
- Squawk under house arrest
- Must be true, says so right here in the Probation Report
- Discovery reform in Brooklyn: fuggetabout WitCom
- Happy Lunar New Year 2020: Year of the Rat
- The Sex Offender Bus
- Head for the hills, discovery reform arrives with the New Year!
- Annals of Social Injustice: Affluent People Drinking Rosé in Central Park
- Is it silly to demand transparency from appellate courts?
- “Your question has nothing to do with this case, Judge.”
- Not your law office? Click here.
- Let’s keep dogs off the witness stand.
- Forget speed dating, try jury duty!
- The Busywork Conspiracy
- Life in non-punitive therapeutic civil commitment is not what you think
- Buster the civil commitment dog
- Is it a crime to sleep it off in your car?
- What really happens in court: the unvarnished truth
- Putting the brakes on “victims’ rights”
- Maestro James Levine (somewhat) rehabilitated
- The Compulsory Program Mystique
- Fox snarls at pursuing hounds, is shot for bullying behavior
- Follow Appellate Squawk on WordPress.com
Tag Archives: Parody
When is parody a crime? When nobody gets it.
One of the most volatile controversies of our time is whether the Dead Sea Scrolls were written by the Essenes, an ascetic community living around 100 B.C. Given the public’s strong feelings on the question, it was only a matter … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Law & Parody
Tagged Dead Sea Scrolls, Golb v. NY State Attorney General, Parody, Professor Norman Golb
4 Comments
Committing felony marriage
There’s an old joke that marriage isn’t a word but a sentence, but it’s not often taken literally. Recently a colleague was representing two co-defendants who agreed to plead guilty in exchange for a sentence of 8 years in prison … Continue reading
Appellate Squawk’s field guide to judicial writing
1. The Grand Style People v. Goldilocks (Grandstand, J.) From time immemorial the historic fabric of society has grappled with the slings and arrows trampling underfoot the proverbial castle that is the citizen’s home. The Framers of the Constitution sought … Continue reading
Posted in Criminal Defense Appeals, Criminal law, Law & Parody
Tagged Judicial writing, Parody, Williams v. Illinois
2 Comments
The new commercial courts
In a bold and creative effort to respond to New York’s grave fiscal crisis, Chief Judge Flipman announced that, following the lead of sports teams, public radio and the Metropolitan Museum of Art, courts will start accepting corporate sponsorship and … Continue reading
The new austerity
For someone who’s been vehemently campaigning for more money for judges ever since he took office, Chief Judge Flipman is pretty good at keeping a straight face when talking about “austerity measures” in the courts. In today’s press release, he … Continue reading
Appellate Squawk 