At a press conference today, Assemblyman Outerboro and Assemblywoman Sixpack announced a new bill that would permit the NY State Division of Criminal Justice Services (DCJS) to accept advertising on its Internet Sex Offender Registry.
“With over a million hits a year, the Registry is premium space,” said Mr. Outerboro. “We’ve already had so many bids, we may have to reduce the size of the sex offenders’ photographs to make room for the ads.”
“We’ve got some very high end businesses interested,” added Ms. Sixpack, “and of course a huge number of political candidates. In fact, Eliot Spitzer has already bought half a million dollars of space for his campaign to re-run for governor.”
“The revenue will fund new public safety programs,” said Ms. Sixpack. “Since most sex crimes occur indoors, we’re moving towards installing surveillance cameras in every home.”
Both solons were confident that there would be no constitutional obstructions. “We can safely leave it to the courts to take care of those,” said Mr. Outerboro with a wink.
Please tell me that this is a joke… please?
Yes, so far. Unfortunately, sometimes reality overtakes parody. . .